New Beginnings

Yesterday I made the decision to add to my journey. Although perhaps it should be considered enhancing both my Journey and future.

Crazy thing when you make a sound decision, and then the attack begins. I struggled with sleep last night so much that I woke up to prayer.

I began calling out to God and seeking sweet sleep. All this occuring in the middle of the night.

When I officially woke up for the day after experiencing one tough battle after the other in my sleep. I put on worship music so to bring myself back.

This is when it came to me. That there are times in our life where we make a choice and stand firm on it. In those moments our enemy seeks out to harm, distract, and try deceiving us in hopes that we will choose to go in the wrong direction.

Although the attack may seem to be strong. It is important that I remember how God is greater than any battle I may have.

Looking forward to officially embarking on this part of journey and sharing it with you all.

Misery Loves Company…..

It’s important that we wake up each day, and choose to change what we don’t like about ourselves.

This journey that I have embarked on is just that. After years of accepting my flaws of poor health and my weight not being what I want I’ve decided to change.

I never thought for a second that I would come across any one who would secretly disagree with my personal movement.

Okay I understand that we all have problems, secret battles, and wars that we rage on the inside.

What’s important is how we deal with those battles. This is something that I have learned the hard way.

After going through many personal battles, wars, trials, and tribulations of my own. I have learned the importance of uplifting people, and extending a hand when I can.

When we go out of the way to hurt someone with our actions or words. Secretly we are wounding and hurting ourselves where we may already be hurting.

On this journey no matter what stones, or obstacles a person throws my way. I accept it as an open invitation to pray for them, an open invitation to use their personal misery as my stepping stone.

Not only do I gain perseverance with each stone tossed. I also gain an understanding of walking this journey alone.

At the end of the day not everyone who stands before you is for you, and that is okay. Misery Loves Company just be sure to let them take that road alone.

Meet Ups

Excited to say that I’ve created a support group. Beginning January we will be meeting up three days a week to exercise.

Our exercise will include walking, the bleachers, stretching, hiking, and light jogging.

This journey is definitely an experience that I will never forget. Although it seems as though my overweight issues occurred overnight. It took time to build up along with many negative choices.

It’s official this journey is beginning to evolve. I look forward to sharing pictures, journaling, meeting people, and experiencing change as it occurs.

Before my grandmother passed away she told me about a dream she had. In her dream I had lost my weight, and told her that I never wanted to go back to that lifestyle of bondage again.

This means so much to me now, because I know that it also meant a lot to her.

I look forward to meeting up with friends and family encouraging each other to push on.

I look forward to posting in my Facebook group, Instagram, and blogging a lifestyle change.

So I am officially saying goodbye to negative choices, bad habits, poor decisions and my overweight self.

Hello change, hello life, hello world, hello opportunities and hello Healthier version of me.

Tracking A Completely New Level Of Journey.

I somehow managed to stumble across an app for tracking my food. Initially I told myself this is going to be a complete waste of time I don’t need to track my food.

Reality is that if I’m going to survive on this journey, and see it through my thought process about tracking my food has to change.

It’s not just important yet vital that I maintain some type of journal depicting everything I consume.

It’s also vital that I begin to keep track of my calories. This is something my doctor has suggested so that I maintain a diet of 2000 calories a day.

Initially I thought to myself completely psycho. Who in their right mind can live life on 2000 calories a day especially when I come from eating more than that.

Having downloaded this free app has been very beneficial for me so far. One of the things I love is how I’m giving a daily amount of points.

Throughout the day I input what I consume. Each meal takes away from my points, and once I’m done that’s it.

Going through this app and figuring out how to work it. Has really put my journey to a new level. Greatful for the changes and growth.

One step at a time.

Tracking My Way To A Healthier Me

For years I was unable to walk as I wanted to. My feet would throb with pain at the very thought of continually moving forward.

I often wondered what was the problem why was I in so much pain and what did I ever do to deserve it.

At some point in life I found myself contemplating all that I have done. I thought about all that I have been through in an effort to seek answers for why I was going through this.

I was unable to wear flats or heels or boots instead I was left with only wearing comfortable tennis shoes.

When I walked my stride would have to be very slow I would have to pace myself so that I wouldn’t overstrain myself.

I had been going through a battle which lasted for what seems like forever and in the mist of that battle coming to an end.

I recall suddenly realizing that my feet no longer hurt. I was in a position to where I was left with no choice but to wear flats.

during the final chapter of this very lengthy and long battle I recall putting my hands on my feet and I sat there to praying asking God to heal my feet so that they would be no more pain.

I asked and it was done not only was I able to wear flats for that one particular day I’ve been wearing them ever since.

So here I am today with tennis shoes on my feet, but this time the journey is much different. I wear these tennis shoes so that I can walk my way to a healthier and better lifestyle.

And it’s the small changes that end of amounting to bigger lifestyle advances.

I’ve managed to download a pedometer this helps me to become accountable with keeping myself aware of wanting to move more throughout the day knowing that each step is counted.

To most this might not appear to be much, but to me it means a lot. This time next year things will have improved.

Morning Routine For SelfCare

I’m learning the importance of Self Care. As a mom it used to be that my mornings were dedicated to cleaning, cooking, and getting my son prepared for the day.

Now that time has passed and my son has gotten a bit older. I am mastering the skilled art of waking up before dawn, and spending time with myself.

Stretching, praying, worshipping, meditating on God’s voice of wisdom and guidance are all a part of how I do my morning self care.

I am also beginning to to incorporate things like washing my face, writing, and preparing anything that could make my day a bit more smooth. For instance if for whatever reason my meal prep has run out, or perhaps I didn’t complete meal prepping. I take this time to get it done.

I take time to pray for not only myself, but for those around me. For people I have come across, or things that have been placed on my heart. I pray for social media, and our country/world as a whole.

The one thing I love to say as soon as I wake up is “This is the day that the Lord has made I will rejoice and be glad in it.” Psalms 118:24 I like to make this scripture personal by changing the word we to I.

If for whatever reason my attitude was not right. This alone helps to reshape my perspective.

Taking time out for me helps me to be, and become a much better person. I am ready for the day, and taking on my task become that much easier.

When Journaling And Planning Is At It’s Best.

Sitting here listening to motivational speakers with my planner and journal at hand. One can simply look at them, and see that they too have encountered adventures of there own.

My journal alone encases stories of laughter, happy thoughts, trials, tribulations, hurtful circumstances, struggles, burdens, barriers, failures, and reevaluations.

It would be far from the truth if I told you that 2019 sailed through without any tears. In fact it would be far from the truth if I even thought to myself that this was not a trying year.

I realize that now’s the time for me to prepare my year 2020. My journals and planner have been used and are ready to be capsulized. One day my son will sit back with his feet propped up reading my thoughts, prayers, cries out to God and words. While gaining a greater understanding of who his mom is, and how God used my circumstances to keep me strong.

So I sit here relaxing, reflecting, and using both my planner and journal for nearly the last time.

In my planner I’m putting together a list of items I need to purchase tomorrow for the new year.

Planner, Journal, Pens, Highlighters, markers, candle etc.

In my journal I write a letter to my son in his future years. I tell him all that comes to mind and is on my heart. I give him advice and take notes of how he is now.

I think to myself that although sometimes I feel tired. Writing in my journal and planner are necessary and we’ll worth it, because it is my son who will gain a side of his mother. A side that perhaps my son might not have known MEMORIES.

Mind Over Matter

Last night I tried something different. As I prepared myself for bed I began to mentally prep for today.

On this journey I have already learned that a major key to success is preparation. Not just minimum preparation, but preparation for all that I do.

So last night I embarked on another avenue of change. As I sat in bed listening to motivational speakers plant seeds of wisdom and encouragement in my thoughts I began to prep for today.

I layed there with my eyes closed, and visioned myself walking up to my closet picking out what I would wear. In my mind I saw myself getting things layed out.

I took out my purple/blue dress, my purple leggings, my flats, my purse, accessories, and I even got my hairstyle picked out. I visioned that I would clean my room and tidy up the house.

My vision continued until I saw myself in my car, and on the road. Although this process is new to me. This is a process that I can see helping me through out my journey.

There are times when I will have to realize that my journey is Mind Over Matter. Taking time out before bed to vision my morning process is definitely beneficial and worth doing.

Mind Over Matter

Saying Goodbye To My Toxic Thoughts….

I have spent the past 24 hours listening to motivational speakers. The sound of assurance, encouragement, and positive words have filled my spine. If ever I found myself in doubt or disbelief now I am sure.

Taking this journey has led me through many ups and downs but my feet are planted I’m standing firm and embarking on change.

I realized that I am tired of being my own worse critic, and that if I’m not approving all of me it’s up to me to change.

Starting this journey to better myself mentally, physically, and spiritually. I want a change and I am tired of living life in a false pretenses that I’m living my best life.

I’m diabetic, weigh of 400 pounds, a mother, sister, daughter, niece, cousin and to some a friend. Thank you to those who appreciate and accept me for who I am, but this journey is for me to better myself and become the best that I can be.

I know what it’s like to have people talk about you, laugh at you, point fingers, mistreat you, and smile in your face. I also know what it’s like to have people genuinely care about you and love you.

This is deeper than any of that because I have been stuck in bondage for so long. I’ve started diets lost a few pounds and then gained back so much more.

It’s much deeper than any of that. The thought of proving to myself that I have what it takes to embark on this lifestyle change and stick to it. The thought of showing my son that you can do anything if you put your mind to it and make it work.

I’ve been in darkness for far to long, and now I’m beginning to see the light. This is a journey that has begun from within me working its way outward because change begins within.

I want to be the person who can inspire those struggling because I come from experience. I want to be apart of and inspire change.

I’m tired of my old way of thinking. I’m tired of putting myself down. I’m tired of mentally getting in my own way by thinking I can never do it.

Change starts with me change starts from within.

Small Things Amount To Bigger Changes.

My basket had several items in it, and it would been impossible for me to carry everything on my own.

As I began to walk away with my purchase a tall, thin gentleman behind me asked if I had gotten my bags.

To my surprise a blessing had occurred. I went into the store on a strict budget which did not have any room for eras or to even purchase a bag.

Greatful I recall having thanked him more than once. Each time he looked at me and said “small things, small things”

This random act of kindness helped to zero in on one important fact about my journey.

With each small step, with each small change. I’m moving forward to an even greater outcome.

For years I was used to fast food, greasy food, unhealthy food and food that was no good for me.

The small thing of changing the way I eat such as having a salad and can of sardines for lunch. Or swapping out my chips for a quick and much healthier seaweed snack. Small things such as waking up earlier to pamper myself and fix myself up. These small things matter and help me move in the direction of success.

I didn’t just go to the store and purchase a few items. I learned a very valuable lesson in life.

Small things matter, and in this season in my life it is the small changes that are amounting to greater outcomes.

So to the gentleman who acted out of faith with an gesture of “small things”

Thank You

Seaweed Crisp sweet and spicy.

Learning to eat healthy is a journey, but sardines have been amazing.